VAN GOGH SHOES AND WHY I HATE THEM

Gooood evening ladies and gentlemen. This is Dr. Regginold Gibson. I am writing to you this fine evening because there is one item that has made my blood boil and my nerves cringe. Most of you know Mrs. Karaszewski. She also has names such as "Night Owl", "Meretrix of the Shadows", and "Night Owl" and now a new name to add to the family: "Vincent Van Gogh-want-to-be". Why such a name? All you have to do it go up to Night Owl, look down, and see her independent-leather-cool-vincent van gogh-want-to-be-shoes that would make only the jolliest baby cry with nightmares. These..."shoes" or "boots" may make her look like the hip new style that everyone wants to have, but really, they are Vincent Van Gogh want to be shoe that will make the wonderful, emotional, brilliant artiste Vincent Van Gogh toss and turn in his God-forsaken grave! I beg you! With all my being, to stop this...this frightening movement! Beware, there are many that wish to join in this movement of vintage leather shoes with pointless copper straps, so watch your back, and just like how we did it with high-waisted-pants, WE CAN DO THE SAME WITH VAN-GOGH SHOES! JOIN ME! JOIN US! JOIN US FOR YOUR CHILDREN. YOUR GRANDCHILDREN! AND THE CHILDREN AFTER THAT! VAN GOGH SHOES MUST BE ABOLISHED! Along with me, Dr. Regginold Gibson, we can stop this mistake.